The most annoying/craziest commercial of the week award goes this week to the mother and daughter who wander into the Verizon store crying pathetically about the notion that the daughter will soon be leaving. I think she is moving up the street or something. It’s difficult to tell they are blubbering so much.
This commercial is so bad I’m not going to put up a Youtube video of it. It’s not a good idea to tempt your reader(s) to shoot your blog and damage their own computer monitor in the process. As one person commented about this travesty:
“if i was rich i’d shoot my TV every time this came on.”
Right on, brother. What gets into the minds of television types that they are able to think of things like this? Never mind, I really don’t want to know. I’ve already seen way too much of what goes on in their minds.
There’s also a guy in this sad and sorry adventure. I think I recognize him from the last time I was in the Verizon store and started to ask questions about how to use my smartphone. Do they give Verizon employees some kind of training to make their eyes open wide while they just sit there and wait for you to leave the store?
This mother and daughter also reminded me of a farewell appearance of Naomi and Wynonna Judd some years back. On one level it is very touching that they can be so close but can you imagine ever trying to date someone like this?
Me: “Hi Dear, I’m home!”
Me: “What’s the matter, why are you crying?”
Did you ever walk on some ice in the late fall that you knew was not quite ready to bear the weight of your big, hairy butt? Well, of course you didn’t! Because you don’t have one of those! I was just projecting, as they say, because I was obese awhile back, like one- third of all Americans these days, and I will never forget the sound of ice starting to crack. Just a little bit. It’s just like the sound of someone shooting your blog!
And that’s what it would be like living with someone like this poor little girl. Or her mother. Don’t even think about the possibility that you would have both of them living with you. Together!!
Which brings up the question, where’s Dad? Doesn’t he need a phone too?
Oh, no. Dad doesn’t need a phone even though he threw his brand new Iphone off a cliff while he seriously considered joined it on a peaceful journey to the bottom of the Grand Canyon. So where’s Dad? Dad’s not here, man. Dad’s down the street at Applebee’s having ten vodka tonics during happy hour. Or, maybe, he’s just off camera coming into the Verizon store with a machete dressed in tribal gear he picked up while on his latest solo vacation to Arizona.
Maybe that’s why the Verizon guy has such wide eyes and excuses himself to go to the back of the store in such a hurry.
Maybe there’s a part two to this commercial? Next month. Or in the fall. Maybe they will bring them all back on December 22 when the Mayan calendar expires. It will make it so much easier to deal with the end of mankind knowing that these crying fools and Verizon, too, have reached the end of the line.
Here’s the commercial if you insist on going there. But please don’t shoot my blog. Close it first. Thank you.